Are you choosing to be the victim?

The mind has more power than you realise! Consider that your own thoughts are the result of how you feel right now.  How you feel right now is not due to that external event/happening, it is due to your thoughts about that external event/happening.

Lets assume you have just received notice that your bank balance is overdrawn.  Ok this is not good news but how you react to it will determine your mood.  Now you can choose to be angry, hurt, fearful or sad, or all four but this wont change anything.  Or you could choose to sit down and work out the best way to get through this.  The first option makes you the victim, the second option puts you in control.

By deciding to accept what has happened, to then put a plan of action in place, will allow you to keep positive and focused on moving forward.  So instead of reacting negatively, you are responding positively!

Think what expenses you can cut back on until payday. Maybe you could borrow some cash from family or a friend to balance your bank until payday. Consider your outgoing expenditure against your incoming and put a plan in place to not let this happen again.

No matter how bad a situation is, there is always a way out.  The important thing is, not to let your mind run wild with thoughts such as “why is this happening to me?”  This type of thinking makes you the victim.

Thoughts come before an emotion, so how you feel is down to your thoughts.  You will have millions of thoughts per day, some will be necessary and practical, however some will result in taking you to a state of mind that can sabotage your life.

So the next time someone does or says something to upset, annoy or anger you, answer these three questions before you do anything.

1. Is this important?

2. Will this bother me next week?

3. Do I really care?

If you answer  ‘no’ to all the above, then simply let it go.  Taking it on board will achieve nothing, other than you being in a bad state of mind.  Reacting will enable that person to see that they have power over you. You can’t control what anyone says or does, but you can control your mind and how you deal with everyday issues.

Instead of reacting, respond.  So instead of shouting and arguing, dismiss it with grace. Instead of taking it on board, let it go.

Your mind is a powerful tool, use it to your advantage.

If you would like to learn more about the Power Within then book your free 30 minute telephone break through session on how to Harness the Power Within.

Simply reply placing Free Breakthrough call on the Power Within in the comment box below.

 

 

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Discover your Future Freedom Now!

Did you know that you were born with a life purpose? That purpose is your talent, something that comes natural to you, that you are passionate about, that you never tire of, that if you were to earn a living from it, you would never work another day in your life.  Once you are living your true life purpose, you will find ultimate fulfilment and freedom.

Unfortunately, due to the rush and stress of everyday life, quite often that ‘purpose’ is pushed aside, sometimes it is buried so deep within that it is forgotten about. The good news is that although it may be buried deep inside, it will always be there, nagging at you, prodding you, begging you to give it life.  You may have this deep routed feeling that there is something more, something else that you should be doing.

Maybe you know exactly what your true purpose and passion is, but fear and doubt is keeping you from living it.  I know just how wonderful life is once you discover and live your true purpose so I now want to give as many people as possible the chance to discover and live their Future Freedom too.  To do so I am offering a free thirty minute  “Discover your Future Freedom”  Coaching Session.

 During this telephone session:

  • You’ll uncover hidden talents and gifts that have been buried deep inside for too long;
  • You’ll uncover hidden challenges that may be sabotaging your self-belief and holding you back;
  • We’ll work together to create a crystal-clear vision of your future goal;
  • You’ll leave the session renewed, re-energized and inspired to finally move forward to your future freedom!

There is living and there is existing, choose to live your life right now!

Note : This offer is open for a limited period only.

 

FREE BREAKTHROUGH SESSION !!

If you feel that something is not quite right, or you don’t feel truly content with your life, then now is the time to take action and get back in control.  You may feel ‘stuck’ or even ‘lost’.   The longer this goes on the more of a struggle it becomes to see clearly, this can then impact on all areas of your life.

If the above sounds familiar then Coaching will work for you.  Coaching will enable you to look deeper, to discover exactly where the problem lies and how to put the appropriate changes in place.  It maybe that you know exactly what is wrong but you are choosing to avoid it for fear of the unknown.

Whether the problem lies within your relationship, your job or life in general, Coaching will bring you clarity and definition on exactly what needs to change to get you to where you want to be and  how to get there!

If you would like to take advantage of my free 30 minute telephone breakthrough session then send a reply stating ‘Free Breakthrough Session’ in the subject box below.

Live the life you love!

 

Values

We all have primary values but we seldom pay them any attention.  We have values in all areas,  Career, Relationship, Family, Fitness, Personal Growth, Spirituality, etc…  If you are not feeling good in any area of your life then it will more than likely be due to your values in that area not being met. Knowing your values, and their relative importance, is key to a happy and a healthy life.

Let’s take a look at job Values and let’s say for instance that your top 3 values in a job are, 1.  Progression, 2. Challenge and 3. Variety.  Now if your current job meets these top three values then you will be contented and fulfilled in your job, however if for instance there is no room for progression, you know the job in side out so there is no challenge and you do pretty much the same routine every day, so there is no variety, then you will find that you will not be happy in your job.  It is important to live by your values, as they are the core of who you are – and who you want to be.

In NLP we usually work with the top 8 Values, I have coached many clients who come to see me due to a feeling of being stuck or discontented and once we get to work on their Values, they are quickly able to see why they feel this way and they are then able to see what they need to do in order to rectify this.

If you feel that there is something wrong in any area of your life then start by looking into your values in this area.  List your top 8 Values, take your time on this, and juggle them around until you are 100% they are in order of importance, 1 being the top most important value.  To help ensure they are in the correct order ask yourself,  “If I could have number 1 but not have number 2 would that be ok”.   If the answer is yes, then you have that value in the correct position, but if the answer is no, then swap them around. Carry on asking questions accordingly, i.e. if I could have number 1, but not number 3, would that be ok? Then repeat with number 2 and follow through until that value has been compared to all the values below it. Then do the same with value number 3 and so on until you have completed all eight.

By doing this you will know for sure that your Values are in line of importance and then you can measure them against the area you are working on by either ticking or crossing.   If your top 4 values are ticked then you will be pretty much aligned and you may just need to make some smaller changes to get the lower values met, however if the top 4 values are crossed then this will signify that you need to make changes in order to be content.

By becoming more aware of the values in all areas of your life, will enable you to use them as a guide to make the best choice in any situation.

 

2015 Is Your Year !

Unlock Your Inner Power

Did you know that 2015 is a great time to make changes, do the things you have been putting off,  reach that dream that is still just a dream, getting out of the job you hate, changing your location, quit smoking, re train, get fit, get slim, get rich etc.  So why is it that usually even before the end of January, those plans, goals, ideas and dreams are fading fast? Because they are  usually New Years Resolutions and they are known to fade fast. So forget the resolutions and instead make plans. Firstly you must change the ‘want’.  Ask yourself, do you just want it?  So often I hear people say “I want to start my own business” my question to them is “do you ‘want’ to start your own business or are you going to ‘have’ your own business?   See the difference here.  Wanting something, means you haven’t got it, when you reach out to the…

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2015 Is Your Year !

Did you know that 2015 is a great time to make changes, do the things you have been putting off,  reach that dream that is still just a dream, getting out of the job you hate, changing your location, quit smoking, re train, get fit, get slim, get rich etc.  So why is it that usually even before the end of January, those plans, goals, ideas and dreams are fading fast? Because they are  usually New Years Resolutions and they are known to fade fast. So forget the resolutions and instead make plans.

Firstly you must change the ‘want’.  Ask yourself, do you just want it?  So often I hear people say “I want to start my own business” my question to them is “do you ‘want’ to start your own business or are you going to ‘have’ your own business?   See the difference here.  Wanting something, means you haven’t got it, when you reach out to the Universe you must be present and in the now and you must talk as if  you already have it.  So instead of, ” I want to be slim, I want to quit smoking, I want to be successful”, change that to “I will be slim, I will quit smoking, I will be successful, I will have my own business”.  Once you say this, you will see how the energy changes and how different and excited you feel. You can achieve what ever you desire, by having the right mind-set, and belief.  When you ‘want’ you are pretty much agreeing that you will never ‘have’.  

Don’t rely on anyone, don’t wait for anything, take action and make it happen, see your dream befall reality. You know what you want, so now visualise the out-come, and then set your short-term  goals, once you break it down into small steps, you will quickly see results and this will motivate you even more. Whilst going through this new transition always focus on ‘now’, do something every day towards your goal. Become aware of your inner state as you reach each milestone, how if feels, what is sounds like, what it looks like, learn new behaviours and thought patterns to accommodate your change of habit and this will ensure that the new way becomes the only way! You have within you, the power and all of the resources required to be the person you truly want to be! Happy 2015 !!

How to Build Your Self Esteem

You know all those negative remarks you have continuously heard all your life, something like,  ‘you are a total idiot’, ‘you are useless, ‘you can’t do anything right’, ‘you will never get anywhere in this life’, and so on and so on.   They are all stored at an unconscious level, and have become part of the makeup of your self- belief.

You may have been criticised negatively, but from endearment, for instance by your parents and siblings, they didn’t necessarily mean you any harm.  You could have had others criticise you negatively, to get a laugh at your expense, or from jealousy, fear, hurt, hate, guilt,  to name a few.

You started to believe all the negative comments you were hearing about yourself and with every negative remark you took on board, your self-esteem decreased.  You became more introverted and self conscious.  You even started to admit to yourself that you are ‘useless’ and an ‘idiot’ and’ can’t do anything right’.  You start to feel de-motivated and believe that you will never amount to much!

Well I have some good news that I am going to share with you!

You will hear criticism throughout your life, simply because you cannot determine or prevent what someone else is going to say or think about you, because this is out of your control.  The only thing in this world that you do have total control over is YOU!

From now on remember this phrase…

What anyone else thinks is none of my business”!

You had a choice and you chose to take the criticism on board.  There are some people that hear exactly the same stuff; however they choose not to believe it and to let it go, their self-esteem is intact. The only difference is they chose a different option.

You see, life is all about choices, you have control over you, no one else.  So make the choice right now, to let go of all those negative comments that you have been holding on to.  Make a promise to YOU right now that you will never again allow negative criticism ‘IN’ and that instead you will ‘LET IT GO’.

Start looking at yourself in a new fresh way, embrace all of your good points, your strengths, your gifts, your talents, love you and accept you.  Let go of all the negativity that has been holding you back; it is time to build your self-belief and to send your Self-Esteem shooting skywards.

It was  you who allowed it to be taken away and only you can bring it back.  Stop listening to that negative voice in your head; instead listen to the positive one that has been struggling for years to be heard.

Step 1. Let go of Negativity:

The next time someone criticises you negatively, visualise slamming the biggest heaviest wooden door and shutting it out!    If you get criticised, you don’t have to argue or fight, you just simply ‘let it go’.  You slam the door, and praise yourself.  Let go of those negative comments.  Remember, what anyone else thinks is none of your business.  Choose to remain positive; to see your value and to love you!

Step 2.   Increase your Self-Belief:

Remember the only thing you have total control over is you.  Don’t concern yourself with happenings that are out of your control.  If you judge yourself badly then you will project this, you must ensure that you remain positive.  Make a list of all of your attributes, your strengths, your talents.  Make a list and pin it up on a wall, read it every day.  Every time you hear your negative self-talk, slam that door shut and replace with positive self –talk.  Look in the mirror; stand tall, with your shoulders back, head high, look at you, and tell you  ‘I am unique, I am worthy and I am a good person’. The more positive you become the stronger you will become, the more you praise yourself, the more you will value yourself and the more motivated you will become.  When you love you, you will project this, and everyone else will see your worth too.

Step 3.  Take back control:

This doesn’t mean being passive or controlling your emotions to avoid confrontation. It means having a natural reflex that enables you to be the ‘greater person’ in tricky situations.  You see when you allow others’ to affect you; you are giving away your power to that person.  By believing in yourself and not allowing outside influences to affect you, you will hold on to your power, turn the other cheek and be the greater person.

Us human beings  are energy, we are one with the Universe.  When you feel good you generate good energy into the universe, when you concentrate on what you want you send ripples of positivity out into the universe and the universe will deliver.  Feel good, concentrate on what you want, dream big, believe in yourself and you will attract an abundant life.